Red Skelton’s Wisdom: Decoding the Mystery of Marriage and Divorce

Richard “Red” Skelton, born on July 18, 1913, and passing away on September 17, 1997, left an indelible mark on American entertainment. Renowned as a versatile entertainer, Skelton’s heyday spanned from 1937 to 1971, captivating audiences through his national radio and television shows, most notably as the affable host of “The Red Skelton Show.” The Hollywood Walk of Fame proudly displays stars honoring his contributions to both radio and television, a testament to his enduring impact.

Red Skelton’s Recipe for the Perfect Marriage
1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.
4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!” she said. So I suggested the kitchen.
5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said “There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!” So I bought her an electric chair.
7. My wife told me the car wasn’t running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, “In the lake.”
8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too late for the garbage?” The driver said, “No, jump in!”.
10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
11. I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was ‘Always’.
12. I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don’t like to interrupt her.
13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?”
I said, “Dust!”.
Can’t you just hear him say all of these?

We The Kids Inc love it. These were the good old days when humor didn’t have to start with a curse word or political. It was just clean and simple fun. And he always ended his programs with the words, “And May God Bless” with a big smile on his face.

Driven by a profound desire to bring joy to others, Skelton considered laughter his life’s purpose. His comedic prowess resonated with audiences over seven decades, leaving an indelible imprint on three generations of Americans. In a generous gesture, Skelton’s widow bestowed numerous personal and professional artifacts, including prints of his artwork, to Vincennes University.

This benevolent act laid the foundation for the Red Skelton Museum of American Comedy in Vincennes, Indiana, a tribute to his enduring legacy. Through this museum, Skelton’s life and contributions continue to be celebrated, ensuring that the laughter and artistry he shared with the world will be cherished for years to come.

We The Kids is honored with presenting Red’s Pledge. We were given permission from Red Skelton’s wife, Lothian Skelton, to use his original wording for our We The Kids Pledge of Allegiance groups. Red Skelton’s pledge was read into the Congressional records twice.

God bless Mrs. Skelton.

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